Random Musings, Uncategorized


Emptiness. Hole. Hollow. “The quality or state of being without something”

These are similar descriptions of feeling nothing. A void.

People with Major Depression and anxiety understand the void very well.

As one with major depression this feeling of emptiness happens quite often especially when under stress.

During these moments of feeling nothing,  it’s almost serene and calm.  No reactions to anything.  No mile a minute thoughts about what is going on.  No anxiety.  No panic.  No feelings or emotions of any kind.  No sadness. No regret.  Just the sense of existing and that is all.

To some people, feeling the void may be the end point of what is going on in their life.  They have been pushed beyond their boundaries and they are now done.  They have either given up or they have decided that this event or person causing the distress is now not worth it to them anymore.   The void can both be a good or bad place.

If the void is a good place your mind is allowing you the time to calm down, focus, and regroup.  A time to decide what is important to you and your own value system.  If the issues that are occurring go against what you believe in or the things you strive for, the void is a momentary pause to regroup and go in a different direction.

Taking time to stop and think about what is important in your life, the goals you’ve set for yourself or how it affects those that are in your life is essential to a healthy mindset.  It provides clarity and sometimes resolution to problems that arise or that may be recurring in your life.  It is only a good thing if you can see it as a positive.  Your mind is protecting you from yourself.

The Void is more often construed as something bad or negative.  To some people it a place where you have given up completely on not only the things occurring within your life; family, friends, work, relationships etc.   It may also signify you giving up on yourself as a person.  To some the void is this place where there is no pain from just existing and living.  In this place one may strive to gain back a sense of who they are or who they define themselves to be.  The void can be created by ones self through substance addictions,  going against social norms, or self-harm.  This is the downside of falling into the void too often and not letting it be something useful and positive.  A person can get lost in it.  Depending on the severity of one’s mental state, the void can be helpful, harmful and sometimes both depending on the outcome.

The void is about changing something that is not going right within your life.  Coming to that crossroads of choice and making a conscious decision of where the path leads to next.  Depression, anxiety, and whole slew of other mental difficulties hinders the process of deciding of what is right for one’s self.  This is when a strong support system is needed to help determine the best course of action.  Unfortunately, for most, there is no such system in place.  So they wander through the void alone, trying to figure it out.

Society as a whole view these “Lost Souls” as not worth trying to save not because they do not care about them but they are afraid and ill-equipped to handle the problems these souls face everyday.  It’s better to turn a blind eye to it than to see it for really what it is; a defect of the society we have created.

As a person who faces difficulty at times because of the depression and anxiety, the void, is a momentary pause to stop and refocus.  It allows me to see my bigger picture clearer.  To envision where I truly want to be and what do I need to change to get there.

One of these moments actually brought me to my current job; helping some of those “Lost Souls” find their way, when they are ready.  I assist in helping them find the resources they need to get to where they want to be and follow-up with them as they grow through their changes.  It’s rewarding most days but there are moments when it just doesn’t work out for the individual so all you can do is reassure them that you will be there when they are ready.

Emptiness, hole, or hollow. “The quality or state of being without something” is not always a bad thing, sometimes it is just waiting to be filled with something to make it whole again.

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